a hundred days in europe

I just realized that December 8 is my 100th day here in Netherlands.

Well... I know a hundred days isn't really a year, but it's almost as much of a milestone.

A hundred days! It feels so ironic that it is also the day when I finally felt the pangs of loneliness. Enough to make the tears come. i let it flow then shake it away, no use in denying emotions. yes, it has been a hundred days away from home, a hundred days away from jan, a hundred days of listless sleep, a hundred days of uncertainty... that is looking at it from the half-empty glass perspective.

But it is also a hundred days of many beautiful, wonderful things:

* of my first autumn -- the experience of the nature's dying, like the phoenix that explodes in mesmerizing fire before it turns to dust. yet knowing that there is a rebirth.















* of my first snow and hail -- snowball fights with bare hands. as the ice hits you or another, it is punctuated with child(-ish, -like) laughter. while autumn is the vibrance of color, the somberness of white is transfixing.

* experiencing europe -- a dream come true! i thought that europe will just forever be a vision from books and movies and now i am here! and there is still so much more of it to see.

* of beautiful friendships forged -- my pinoy mafia keeps me sane. will definitely miss the old batch who have always been so accommodating of our barging in the headquarters. to my new friends from all continents who have taught me so much about the world much bigger than what i have known. my first american thanksgiving to happy halloweens, from standing up against poverty to transformations. i never in my life dreamed education can be this interesting!


and so much more in those hundred days! from cooking and finally finding out for myself that there is a vortex in the laundry machine that sucks out half of a pair of socks and gloves leaving my closet with three unpaired socks and gloves... nights of singing and dancing and watching other people get wasted... to pining and wishing for those comfortable warm hands... to just realizing every day of my life that i am alive and tingling with all sorts of emotions, be it sadness or happiness.




the first hundred days and triple more ahead here in europe. looking forward to the joys and pains of what is to come! well, not so much the pain, but i have to be realistic here. 2008 is almost gone and 2009 is coming. i may not be raring to go at the moment, but i'm ready. ;p