2009-01-31

melancholia at noontime

it's a strange time of the day to feel melancholic. it is noon time with the sun shining in full glory. not a cloud in sight. it's the kind of sunlight that invites on to be outside. except i just woke up and it's probably really cold. despite the time, despite the beckoning world... the music on my laptop is playing songs of love and longing...

'dagat' written by gary granada directly translates to 'ocean'. it is a song about the ocean dividing two people but bridging them as well. the way it is sung and played on the guitar is simply poignant, pulling at my heart strings.

this song was taught to me by rose, a good friend who passed away many years ago. i was going to leave for my volunteer year and was leaving someone behind. i think it was her way of cheering on our relationship.

and now i sing this to jan... (well, gary g. sings this to jan for me)

Namamaybay
Ang tubig sa paypay ng hanging habagat
Dumadampi
Sa umaasang pisngi ng tabindagat
Dagat na pagitan ng ating pag-ibig
Singlawak, singlayo, singlalim
Ngunit sa isang panig, dagat ang nagsasanib
Ng dalampasigan mo sa akinNamamangka
Ang aking diwa sa nakalipas

Tumatawid
Sa ibayong daigdig ng ating bukas

Sa dagat ng pangako, sa laot ng pangarap
Sa alon ng iyong mga halik
Dagat din ng luha ng pusong naghihirap
Naghihintay sa iyong pagbabalik

2009-01-23

sigh

di ko maintindihan nararamdaman ko ngayon. PMS ba to? post-flu depression? ewan. di ko makuhang basahin ang dapat kong basahin na kung tinuloy-tuloy ko ay matagal ko nang tapos basahin. baka naintindihan ko pa.

biglang... malungkot lang. hay.

2009-01-18

sa inog ng tugtog ng buklod

kahit makailang-ulit kitang pakinggan, patuloy mo pa ring kinukurot ang aking puso. hindi ko alam kung kaya kong harapin ang iyong mga hamon. hindi ko alam kung may sapat akong lakas o pakikipag-kapwa para gawin iyon. ngunit mabuti na rin na paulit-ulit kong pakinggan ang mga salaysay mo tungkol sa mga kuwento ng mga nilalang na isinasantabi sa isang sulok. bilang paalala.

ang musika mo ay siyang ugnay ko sa tahanang panandaliang iniwan. salamat.

2009-01-16

i want!

the freakin'ly awesome limited Coraline shoes! stitches and buttons. oh man, oh man, oh man!

2009-01-15

OMG!

mabuhay ang youtube!

i just found the link of the bagets movie! the best pinoy teen movie ever. i'm so happy, i think i could cry. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fpftOPjJ3I&feature=PlayList&p=9EC521ED6FB22659&index=0&playnext=1

2009-01-03

sabi ni neil gaiman...

nung simula ng 2008...

May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.

magic... dreams... good madness... check! fine books... check! kiss someone who thinks i'm wonderful... check! some art -- write, sing, live as only i can... check! surprise myself... check!

not bad!

and for 2009, he says...

...I hope you will have a wonderful year, that you'll dream dangerously and outrageously, that you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and that you will be liked, and that you will have people to love and to like in return. And, most importantly (because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now), that you will, when you need to be, be wise, and that you will always be kind.

hopefully, will all do as last year. :)

2009-01-01

back from holiday vacation

and now i have to cram 2 months readings into four days. nyahahaha!

but it was the best vacation i have had and i've been too many. thank you to our wonderful french hosts who made our stay so comfortable and enjoyable... as in overwhelmed with goodness talaga ang pakiramdam ko...

this is a quickie post and i intend to write a better ode to 2008 which has been a good year. but that will come after exams and my paper. (good luck na lang kung pano ko gagawin lahat yun sa nalalabing araw.)

sa ngayon, ninanamnam ko lang ang ligaya ng nakaraang sampung araw.

(jan ko... alam kong di ka matampuhin pero gusto ko pa ring sabihin that i wished you were there all the time. but of course, i still enjoyed so much. you would want me to, i know. )

2008

i know i should really start studying. i've already wasted the last two and a half weeks not doing anything decent for school. tomorrow, i promise (to myself), i will devote to populations and developments and whachamacallits. as the first day of the new year comes to a close here in den haag, i shall devote it to answering a survey. just because i can't go to sleep and i have not yet had enough coherent thought to truly fully reflect on my year. LOL.

* * * * *
where did you begin 2008?
at home, in davao city lighting candles and saying a prayer. i think it worked because most of what i prayed for happened.

what was your status by valentine's day of 2008?
engaged but away from my fiance

did you have to go to the hospital?
yep. i just discovered i was allergic to mefenamic acid. had trouble breathing after i took a tab.

did you have any encounters with the police?
hehe. yeah. we asked a University of the Philippines police to join our pre-nuptial wedding photos by pretending that we were under arrest. he was one cool dude!

what did you purchase over $500?
my laptop which i needed for school. wedding rings. and several other stuff related to the wedding.

did you know anybody who got married?
me. LOL. and van. and so many other people i can't remember right now.

did you know anybody who passed away?
my dear dog, mojo. :(
and a tragedy to a good friend.

what sporting events did you attend?
UAAP games! go ateneo! champion!!!

what concerts/shows did you go to?
can't remember right now but i know i did go somewhere. nothing big maybe that's why i can't remember

where do you live now?
temporarily in dorus 166 in den haag

describe your birthday.
quiet. lunch with assisi people. and mass before that. dinner with jan at cafe mediterranean and coffee at someplace. forgot my camera in that place, stupid of me. but got it back of course. thank god nobody got it before the girl in the cafe!

what's the one thing you thought you would never do but did?
go to an actual french party. had a great time there! especially with having my mouth literally on fire. ;p

any new additions to your family?
jan. and the rest of the camina family. :)

what was your best month?
hard to say. my first trip abroad ever in february. got married and had honeymoon in june. found out about my scholarship july. flying to netherlands august. seeing parts of europe october november december.

who was your best drinking buddy?
i don't drink. but i make a few exceptions as long as i have my meds around. hehe. so i would just have to say the pinoy mafia

made new friends?
many many many. and so happy about that!

any regrets?
i try not to. but maybe not buying the golem book and the mucha mousepad in prague.

overall, how would you rate this year?
one of the best in my life. i knew that 2008 would be a great year and it was. and 2009 would be as good, if not better. especially when jan comes for the summer, we gonna rock this joint! ;p

have any life changes in 2008?
hell yeah. 2008 was all about changes. from single to married. from philippines to the world! from employee to student. to micro to macro. whoa!

get a new job?
i actually had to let it go. LOL.

how old did you turn this year?
30

did anything embarrassing?
nuninuninuninu....

get married or divorced?
married.

be honest - did you watch american idol?
hell yeah. david cook!

start a new hobby?
eh... facebook, i guess.

are you happy to see 2008 go?
you move on. every day is a new day. it's all about saying hello to each day, right? :)

drank starbucks in 2008?
opkors. coffee dates with friends, can't help it.

been naughty or nice?
nyahahaha! of course. go figure. ;p

what are you wishing for in 2009?
do well. have passion. see the world. be with jan.

cut class?
to see ateneo win the championship from lasalle. and to fly to italy. good cuts i would say. ;p

was involved in something you'll never forget?
yup

cooked a gross meal?
nothing gross.

lost something important to you?
my watch. booooo!

got a gift you adore?
jan :)

tripped over a coffee table?
i tripped a lot. not sure if it was a coffee table though

dyed your hair?
nope

came close to losing your life?
thank god no

went to a party?
partieS!

read a great book?
of course.

what did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
live abroad. travel europe. get married.

did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't make new year's resolutions

did anyone close to you give birth?
rowie!

what countries did you visit?
singapore, holland (but i live here), czech republic, italy, france. (not bad for a middle class pinoy!)

what dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
january 31 - my first international flight
june 13 - wedding
july 4 - got my scholarship acceptance letter
august 30 - left for netherlands
december 23- january 1 = france vacation - da best


what was your biggest achievement of the year?
getting the scholarship. making our community teachers feel they have worth because of the education program we implemented in their areas.

what was your biggest failure?
not getting to do the rick astley medley for our grand entrance to the reception. LOL.

did you suffer illness or injury?
asphyxiation from mefenamic acid allergy

what was the best thing you bought?
wedding rings and a laptop

where did most of your money go?
payments for life insurance and pension. preparations for going to netherlands.

what did you get really, really, really excited about?
our honeymoon and my scholarship.

what song(s) will always remind you of 2008?
my one and only love. particularly when it was being played as i was walking down the aisle
seasons of love from rent

compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? happier

ii. thinner or fatter? fatter

iii. richer or poorer? poorer because i dont have savings

what do you wish you'd done more?
secret. hehe.

what do you wish you'd done less of?
get irritated

what was your favorite tv program?
csi. how i met your mother. top model. hehe.

do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
hate is not good

what was your greatest musical discovery?
johsa, nick, eva and vina. ;p
and christopher!

what did you want and get?
scholarship!

what was your favorite film of this year?
juno

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
doing that rick astley grand entrace. LOL.

how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
casual as always

what kept you sane?
jan.

what political issue stirred you the most?
nbn-zte broadband scandal. the gall of our leaders to be that corrupt when people are dying from hunger. terrible.

who was the best new person you met?
too many! but i have to make special mention of miriam and tuff in montpellier and crevette in paris. i am still in awe by their generosity to accept us in their homes. more than france itself, it was these people who made our vacation the best ever.

tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
to BELIEVE.

quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
what a journey it has been

do you have a new years resolution for 2009?
nope.

did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2008?
more than i usually do (which is like a couple of sips a year) so i definitely had a lot of sips this year. ;p

if you could go back in time to any moment of 2008 and change something, what would it be?
our reception entrance. yes, i REALLY WANTED to do the rick astley entrance. that would have been, quoting barney stinson, "LEGEN- wait for it- DARY!"

how are you different now that the year has ended?
i've had more parties than i ever had in my life. i've been to more countries this year than the rest of my life combined (because i was just in the peens. hehe!)

what do you want to change in 2009?
to lose that stomach fat. but it seems willing it away is not enough anymore. LOL

what are your wishes for the new year?
health and safety for everyone i love, just like what i pray for every night. :)
to have jan come over as soon as he can and celebrate our anniversary in europe.
to learn as much as i can here at the ISS.